Even if you didn't watch the Super Bowl last night, it would be hard not to see or hear all about the half-time show featuring the talented JLo and Shakira. As a fellow Latina woman who grew up at a time when being Latina was not something anyone talked about in my suburban, predominately white neighborhood, seeing these women at the top of the game was thrilling and inspiring for me!
Moving on...
As expected, there is lots of talk about how "good" their bodies look, their age and their costumes. For a fresh perspective, I want to shift the narrative and talk about this instead.
⭐JLo and Shakira are two midlife women who are living out their dreams proving that midlife women don't need to blend into the background just because they reach a certain age. This is inspiring to young girls and women (and non-binary folks too) of all ages to see.
⭐They are both gifted performers who are sharing their gifts with the world reminding us that it's never too late to dream or to see our dreams come true.
⭐It’s refreshing to see women who work hard and get ahead in this world, especially in a male dominated field like the music industry. Again, reflecting back to us that hard work and dedication can be rewarded to any of us.
⭐Women of any age are allowed to wear whatever they please. I love that both women wore provocative clothing that many wouldn’t dare wear at their age bucking the idea that only certain types of clothing are permissible for older women to wear.
⭐While it appears that they are in excellent physical condition (cardio), we’ve no idea what they’ve had to endure to remain “smaller” and "fitter". Let's not forget that Beyonce had confessed adhering to an extremely restrictive and disordered diet when she was preparing for her Coachella concert in 2019. Just because our culture normalizes disordered eating, that doesn't make it normal!
What diet culture tells us...
Diet culture would like us to believe that woman at any age can be thin and have a shape like JLo or Shakira if they just tried hard enough. This simply isn't true. Research indicates that weight is very complicated and many factors influence a person's weight, shape and size. Even if it were true, it often comes at a high emotional and physical cost.
Many diet culture victims preach that these women look amazing "for their age" and that we should all aspire to look like that. I'm not surprised so many feel this way because diet culture is pervasive and omnipresent. And, of course, many do wish to look this way because it would be much easier considering our culture puts so much value on thinner, smaller, fitter bodies.
The truth is...
As radical diet culture dropouts, we know that (or are re-learning) that all bodies are worthy at any age, weight, shape and ability level. We don’t have to feel badly that we don’t look like, dance like or dress like these women.
We’re learning that there is more to a woman’s beauty than just her outsides. So, give yourself permission to wear what's comfortable on your body and what makes you feel confident and strong!
We are of value simply because we were created. The true value of a woman (or any other human) is and never will be defined by her appearance, her talents or anything else.
Do not allow any of this to derail your recovery.
Join the discussion in the No-Diet Sisterhood on Facebook.
Think You're Too Old to Try Intuitive Eating?
There is mounting evidence that a no-diet approach focusing on improving self-care and listening to one's body is much healthier in the long-run than dieting could ever would be, regardless of weight and/or size.
I want to be clear that this approach is available to people of all ages (and genders, sizes, ethnic backgrounds, socioeconomic status, etc.). What I've learned from my own personal experience, and from coaching my clients, is that anyone who is open to change can reap the benefits of this approach. The expression "You can't teach an old dog new tricks" needs to be challenged. It's stereotypical and disempowering. Change is possible for women of all ages. While I recognize that some people are more privileged than others, I still believe that with some tweaks, this can work.
After being caught in the snares of an eating disorder, coupled with mountains of body dissatisfaction for several decades, I discovered intuitive eating when I was approximately 45 years old. As I've written about many times, intuitive eating changed my life in unimaginable ways. While I realize this is my personal journey, my clients have also had similar positive experiences and they range in age from 30 to 65 years old.
To be honest, this work isn't easy for most to adapt to at first, regardless of age. Why? Because it goes against nearly everything we've been taught about weight, bodies, and diets. It also challenges the way we look at bodies and invites us to explore the reasons why we believe that one body is "better" or has more value than another.
I don't think anyone would refute that there are many, many layers and challenges in doing this work. After all, we are all swimming in diet culture 24/7 and it’s very alluring! As challenging as peeling back those layers can be sometimes, doing so helps us to grow in ways that will undoubtedly bring about more peace within ourselves and in many other areas of our lives.
If you're more seasoned (age 45+) and/or have a very long and challenging relationship with food and think that you're too entrenched in your "old" ways, think again. If you believe you won't be able to successfully practice and/or embody intuitive eating into your life, understand that this is a limiting belief. Limiting beliefs, left unchallenged, could hold you back from experiencing the freedom from food and body satisfaction that you're seeking.
Are you willing to take that chance?
Takeaways:
Self-care is the answer, not dieting.
Unlearning is possible at any age.
Diet culture is relentless.
Body dissatisfaction is learned.
Limiting beliefs are dream killers.
Support usually makes the journey easier and more manageable.
If you're tired of battling with your weight, fed up with the cycle of yo-yo dieting, and yearning to be free from your obsessive thinking about food and your body, schedule your complimentary Embrace Anti-Diet Living Connection Session.
We’ll get clear on where you are now, what you want instead, and what might be getting in the way of your success.
I’ll also share some powerful recommendations and resources to get you started on creating a peaceful relationship with your body and food.